30 Jul 2016

Weight loss- My first steps

I mentioned in my previous post that this year I had started to try and lose weight. It took me eighteen years but I finally realised my body deserves better! I used to eat whatever I could get my hands on, but now I’ve come to the realisation that I am going to have this body for the rest of my life, so why should I treat it like shit. My old GP used to always refer to our bodies as cars, and I couldn’t agree with him more. Our bodies need the right fuel to be able to work, just like a car. No one wants their car to stop in the middle of the street and I’m sure you don’t want your body to stop in the middle of your life. My first step to actually beginning this journey was that I’m not going to let my silly choices prevent me from living my life because I have heart disease and diabetes. But, this one step was not good enough! I had to actually do something about it! (That may be something I will discuss in future posts).


Before I actually began to try and lose weight I would watch all of these YouTube videos about all of these people who had lost over 100 pounds and one thing that would always come up is that you have to love yourself and your body along the journey and not just expect to love the way you look at the end and then you’ll be happy forever. When I used to hear that I used to just think okay that’s such bullshit, why is that even important, and I think I finally understand! If you go in with the mindset of ‘I won’t be good enough until I’ve lost ‘this’ much weight’ you will never be good enough. And as harsh as that may sound I was also someone who used to think like that. It wasn’t until I accepted my body and who I am that I actually began to lose weight successfully. We all go through periods in our life where we just can’t find it within us to love ourselves and I went through that in my early teens. I used to be obsessed with wanting to be skinnier but it never happened because I was so caught up with this idea of ‘perfect’ instead of losing weight all I did was gain weight. I genuinely believe that was because I didn’t love myself. I didn’t love myself so I didn’t care about what was going into my body, I didn’t care about the fact that I had a life to live so I would stay at home instead of going out with friends so I became very inactive. Clearly, my teenage years (even though I’m still a teenager) where pretty rough and being inactive and eating crap 24/7 did not lift my mood. The consequence of gaining weight did not lift my mood.

I can sit here and say I wish someone had just told me to stop it and just be healthier. People probably did tell me that and I probably let myself get down about it and then stuff my face with some chocolate. I think the main thing I’ve realised from reflecting on these dark moments of my life is that comfort eating doesn’t do anything. Yes it may be comforting in the moment, but that’s momentary happiness and comes with a lot of risks that can affect my future. So is it really worth it?

I wish I could  say the journey has been easy and now I have reached my goal weight, but I can't say that. This has been one of the most difficult journey's of my life and I am nowhere near to my goal weight, however, I've never been closer. I also don't have any before pictures or any high-quality pictures of me now! All I have are these. I hope the fact that these are bad quality photos shows you that this is a real journey because these pictures were taken just to show a friend an outfit or shoes they were not taken for the purpose of the blog post and therefore, I am not trying to appear slimmer or prettier. These are raw photos from my life.






16 comments :

  1. good luck on your journey - you look great! xo

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  2. I love this, wishing you all the luck!

    abisjourney.com xoxo

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  3. Good luck! I'm very much going to get on with losing weight, this has inspired me!

    sisterofthemoonx.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. Thank you very much! Hope you succeed! x

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  4. We wish you luck on your journey, we wish we had the motivation that you have to do what you do, but food is literally our life haha wishing you al the best!

    Jessica & James
    www.foodandbaker.co.uk

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    Replies
    1. haha food is my everything too! That's what makes tit so difficult! Thank you for the kind words x

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  5. Good luck! I'm on the same journey so we're in it together ;) x

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    1. You too! It's nice to go along the journey with someone haha x

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  6. Best of luck!
    Lauren | laurmatthews.blogspot.com

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  7. Wow your hair looks amazing! I love it!

    www.darriyancateland.blogspot.co.uk♡

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  8. Good luck! I hope you will lose weight.
    xx
    lulinaiem sakura viet nam
    http://sakurabeauty.vn/

    ReplyDelete

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